Daylight comes with mixed emotions
and confused thoughts.
If only things could be straight ahead and understandable.
Sometimes thinking becomes over analysis
and the mind a whirlpool.
Still, there is a peace that does return
when I least expect it,
so I will make the choice to comfort myself
choosing hope instead of despair.

A sleepy Monday,
lunch with my son.
I spent the time listening to his dreams,
watching my features move under his face.
Fatherhood is one of the greatest joys.
I continually find myself amazed
by the emergence of young lives
full of drive and vision.
He left in a hurry with a firm handshake,
and a gentle and affectionate pat,
impatient to meet a young man's afternoon.
For the next few minutes I sat alone at the table,
with my mineral water and pot of tea
basking in the afterglow of the past hour.

Today is entirely beautiful.
A gentle breeze, a shimmering blue sky
and spring exalting itself
in a kaleidoscope of colours and perfumes.
This is altogether too beautiful for words.
The days have turned the chill of winter
into a soft warmth that renders
jumpers and coats unnecessary.
We have emerged from hibernation
and blink sleepily at the sun.
It is quite simply a beautiful day.

Nothing makes the afternoon more pleasant
than a pot of tea
and a bottle of sparkling mineral water.
I can spend hours in my favourite cafe,
sitting in the dappled sunlight,
watching the world go by
quietly sipping this most noble brew
accompanied by my favourite
lightly sparkling Italian mineral water.
If ever we have the chance to share
the crisp golden light of a long afternoon
be sure to allow enough time
for a pot or two,
fine china preferably,
a cup and saucer
and never, ever anything but
leaf tea.
There is nothing better
and it is so good for the soul.

thank you
for the gift of life
for breath
and the beating of our hearts.
thank you
for the highs and lows,
the joys and the sadnesses.
thank you
for the beauty that surrounds us,
and our ability to appreciate it all.
I am amazed by life,
the journey that is within
and without
it's freedoms
and the debts we carry.
I must be sure to remember these things
and be thankful.

darkness and light.
do we flee from the darkness
to embrace the light
or do we wrestle with the darkness
whilst we see the light?
the darkness is in us all.
we try to ignore it,
putting it behind us
pretending it isn't there.
But the darkness is alluring,
it is angry,
it is selfish and self seeking,
it is our flesh and our blood,
our minds and our souls.
The light calls us
to face our darkness
with unabashed honesty
for only them can we
escape the tentacles of guilt
that drive us into isolation,
hiding from the light
and our true selves.

Sunday

It's another Sunday
I cannot help thinking
that there must be more than this.
Why do the homeless still sleep
lonely and abandoned
on park benches

while the sound of singing is heard
from those called to help?
Please, I do not wish to criticise,
I simply want to ask the question.
why does there seem to be bleating
where there should be seeking
the lost and the lonely,
the widow and orphan?
Please I do not wish to criticise
I simply wish there was more than this.

Friday's prayer.

Lord help my cynicism
find the truth.
May my doubts be overwhelmed
by the knowledge of you.
Let my hopelessness
be filled with light
and the darkest pathway
lead homeward.

Sometimes
I wish that life could be
a fairytale.
Simple questions,
simple answers
with heroes and heroines.
we could cheer them on from the sidelines
assured that, in the end,
they will all live happily ever after.
But,

life is no fairytale
and walking this earth
is decidedly cruel.
Our heroes become villains
our heroines, flawed,
and we stumble alone in the dark
holding our little candles of hope,
shielding them from the storm.
Questions, so many questions,
so often the answer is silence.
life moves on, unyielding,
no fairytale, no promise
of happily ever after.
Oh light in the darkest night
shine about your children.
we are all lost and we cannot find the way home.

my mind is overflowing with questions.
once upon a time I would have chased them away
but now I welcome them.
The more I seek answers
the more answers I'll find
I do not want my faith to lie lazily in a Sunday pew
I cannot bring myself to rise up in moral outrage,
I am far to flawed for that.
all in all my hope clings to a tenuous trust
in spiritual reality,
a reality that reaches
my darkest moments
and my frailest fears.
This is the God I seek.
One who will wrestle with my doubts,
revealing himself outside my expectations,
challenging all I hold dear
confronting my religious heart.

may light find me in the depths
and hope reach me in the deep.
trusting you, help me let go
and drift with the currents.
my mind is often in turmoil,
my thoughts restless and wild
may peace find my troubled soul
and quieten my anxious heart.

Friday's Prayer.

Lord of the brokenhearted,
the sad, the shamed and the cast down
draw us nearer
as we draw near to you.
may our hope
not be in vain
or our trust disappointed.
Let our failing hearts
be comforted
and our troubled minds reassured.

eternity paused in time,
joining the brokenness of finite flesh
Life challenged death's darkness within.
Our frail fears denied the divine
choosing instead to define Love
with the wisdom of flawed humanity.
In violence and cruelty we made our case
challenging the universe to respond
daring heaven to take up arms.
In agony one solitary figure cried the word
that would now mark all time future and past;
forgiveness.

A prayer for tuesday

my prayer is that we
would find life
and live it
with selflessness and integrity,
finding love
and being lovers
brave and courageous.
I pray that grace may find us
accepting who we are and who we are not,
affording others the same honour.
May mercy be on our lips,
peace in our hands
and may hope
be undiminished
through every dark night.
I pray that we be givers,
light bringers
mindful of our frailties
seeking wisdom
whilst hesitant to speak
choosing to wait,
to watch and to listen.
My prayer is that
we choose to share
and to serve,
to heal
not to hurt,
patient and understanding,
embracing the truth.

faith is wrestling doubt with trust.
hope is believing for an outcome.
love is doubt's security and
faith, hope and trust's anchor.

Receiving grace
to be gracious
being forgiven
to be forgiving,
receiving mercy,
to be merciful
knowing love
to be loving
being accepted,
to be accepting
In receiving
giving
knowing you
facing truth
in the truth
being free,
being free
to see reality
a reality that drives us to
grace

A meditation

We learn so much in the darkness,
but only appreciate it
when we emerge into the light.